You plan your life, you don’t plan for cancer. This was something that you hear happening to others, not us.
45 stories for 45 years. Throughout 2026, we’re sharing the stories of our clients, volunteers and staff who make the Wessex Cancer Support community what it is.
Through our community’s lived experience of cancer, we can provide our clients with the tailored support they need.
For this edition, Alison, a client of Wessex Cancer Support, shares their story and experience.
This was the second diagnosis of cancer within three years.
My husband had first been diagnosed in 2021. Initially, we thought it had been a reaction the flu jab. They had drained the lump as they thought it was a cyst, but after several procedures, the medical team decided an MRI was needed. The consultant said, with little comfort, ‘well, he isn’t riddled with cancer.’
It was only on reflection after the MRI appointment we realised, we realised the consultant hadn’t meant he was clear of cancer.
A week later my husband had a biopsy and then his tonsil removed – it was cancer. He was more prepared than I was and I found him trying to protect me by not sharing. He needed to focus on himself, but I started to feel lonely, not knowing what to do or where to turn.
You plan your life, you don’t plan for cancer. This was something that you hear happening to others, not us.
We had moved to the Isle of Wight as part of our future retirement plans. Immediately, things were changing. We needed to make some lifestyle changes, too, to manage my husband’s treatment, and not the changes we had planned.
This was all happening during the pandemic lockdowns. Having just moved to the area, we couldn’t meet our neighbours and our son was living on the mainland at the time. I didn’t want him to have the additional worry about me; it was challenging for all of us.
After the operation, my husband required additional care and support. I was helping him with medication and helping to feed him. He had lost the ability to eat and taste very early on in his treatment.
To cope, my husband just focused on getting better. As he should. He had switched off, just to put all his energy into getting through the throat cancer. While it was more than understandable, the knock-on impact was big. It was overwhelming.
You don’t want anyone to experience anything like this. None of my family had anything like this previously, it was a real shock, and I felt really lonely. I didn’t want to put the additional burden of how I was feeling on my son or husband. I realised that in order to support my husband, I also needed support.
I had connected with Wessex early on. The support we received was brilliant. The counselling and Reiki sessions really made a difference, and the fact we could drop-in at any time and chat was great. The online Zoom sessions meant that we had a regular group we can each talk to, whether it’s about something totally different or if I just need to offload.
All that came into its own when my husband had his second diagnosis of cancer last year. I felt more prepared and I knew that I had a network and support that I could rely on.
That’s why it’s important people know that services like Wessex exist. Everybody’s experience is different, but as a carer, knowing that support is available for you as well as the person with the diagnosis makes all the difference. It’s okay to reach out and ask for help; the support I receive means I can support my husband better.
For all the negatives, we’ve made some really good friends through this experience, and while there’s always that niggling doubt that it could happen again, we’re looking forward and focus on each day.
We’re back to planning our holidays, continue to enjoy going to music festivals and walking our new puppy, enjoying our new life here on the Isle of Wight.
Our community provides a safe, supportive space for people affected by cancer. Through our emotional and wellbeing services, we provide the support to our communities in Dorset, Hampshire and the Isle of Wight.
We’ve been here for you since 1981.
You can call or email your local cancer support centre today or drop in to speak to our friendly team.
